Showing posts with label Benjamin Ogden. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Benjamin Ogden. Show all posts

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Spring days.



                                                                                                                        May 8, 2013


Dear Jack,

Just thinking about you and wondering how you are doing. I hope you are having a great day.  You are getting so big 2 and ½ wow, time is going by so quickly.  The days are getting warmer and summer is just around the corner, your cousin Boston loves to be outside. I am sure that you do too. 

There are so many great things for you to discover, and I am sure that you are a curious little guy.  Bugs and dirt are endless fun for little boys. Boston can spot and ant from quite a long ways away and loves to play trucks in piles of dirt.  Your daddy and Uncle Josh would practically live outside in the summer, climbing trees, riding bikes and playing with friends. 

Do you like to draw? Do you love music? Do you like dirt bikes and monster trucks like your cousin?  Are you outgoing and funny, or do you have a more mellow personality with a quick but sly since of humor?  Are you talking up a storm, and do you know your colors?  Do you know how much you are loved and missed, because you are so very much?

Jack, we want to know that we are all doing fine though we miss you daily life has continued on.  We have grown and changed because of what has happened over the last 2 ½ years, but it has not all been negative. There has been positive changes as well.  There are new cousins and weddings on the way, there have been fun family gatherings and vacations that are being planned.  Don’t worry about us, we won’t ever give up, but we will also continue to live life to the fullest as we wait for your return. 

Your daddy is doing well. He has big plans and his life is changing fast.  I know that you will be as proud of him as we all are. He is such a fun and loving man. We are so grateful to have him in our family.  He thinks of you and misses you all the time and only wants the best for you. Please always remember that.

If I could say anything to your adoptive parents it would be, we love you and only want the very best for you.  We are grateful to know where you are and that you are being loved and well cared. There is true comfort for your daddy and family in knowing those small yet very important things. So many fathers and families don't have that knowledge.   I understand it is difficult for them to put themselves in your daddy or our shoes; we have tried over and over to put ourselves in theirs.  Over time perhaps they will come to understand why we could never or will never give up on you.  Perhaps they are only listening to their attorney at this time and that is why they have not responded to our multiple requests to share information with them, including but not limited to all medical information.  We truly hope that one day soon they will open their hearts to the fact that you have a daddy and family that loves you and miss you so much. 

Remember Jack as you are reading this one day, this blog was our only way to reach out at the time to you.  It is where we could express our feelings, upcoming events, notices of court actions, as well as show support for others who have experienced the same loss.  This blog was never to cause pain, but instead a way to deal with ours as we wait for you to come home.  We do hope and pray that your adoptive parents will read this and understand that.  We will continue to pray for you and them daily, we truly only want the best for you.


Love

Grandma Jenny

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Next Step.

We have heard back from Judge Hamilton on the constitutionality motion. He has denied Jake's motion. He felt like Jake's constitutional rights were not violated and he did not file timely.

This means we will be moving on with appeals as we originally had planned. It is our belief the judge felt like he was not able to rule on constitutional rights at his court level. We have another 1-3 years of court battles ahead of us.

As you can imagine we are all physically, mentally, emotionally and financially exhausted. Any financial help would be greatly appreciated to help with the ongoing legal battle. You can donate at the paypal account located on the right side of this blog. Jake will not let money get in the way to fight until the end for his son.

We still have hope that the Utah Supreme Court will rule in our favor due to the constitutionality motion. We feel like if we can also get the law changed, there is a hope we can potentially be grandfathered in, but will most likely not happen.

We will be doing some fundraisers in the Spring, and would love any help we can get with donations, or volunteers.

Thank you so much for all of the continued support and prayers. We will never give up on Jackson. He deserves the right to have his father in his life.

Jackson, we will be with you one day, we are hoping it's not when you turn 18, but nonetheless we will be with you! We Love You.

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Dear Readers.


Dear readers,

This is Jackson’s grandma. I would like to personally thank each and every one of you for your support and love that you have continued to show us over the last two years.  We have had so many emotions, blessings and heartaches that we would not have been able to get through without the continued support of family and friends. 

I would like to write today in response to one comment recently posted on the blog under the post “Stealing from the married ones too” regarding an article in the Salt Lake Tribune written by Brooke Adams.  First I, we would like to say we do not normally respond to negative comments because everyone has the right to their own opinion and we have learned a great deal about all sides of adoption.  Emotions are high from each angle. We respect that.

Though this comment made a statement at the end which is totally untrue. Jake has not acted in any way “creepy” towards the birth mother or adoptive parents.  In fact Jake has from the beginning taken the high road, and tried to ensure that the names of the adoptive couple are not revealed.  He has not spoken with Whitney since the night that she told him that she had given Jackson up.  We have seen Whitney in court twice, while supporting Kyle(Whitney's ex husband) in a court hearing which involved two counts of child neglect that had been reported to DCFS.  But, none of our family spoke to Whitney. 

As far as reaching out to the adoptive couple, I placed two calls in April 2011, to the paternal grandparents requesting that the couple and Jake meet to share their sides of the story.  I did this because I know them, and had babysat for them as a teenager; one of the children I tended was the adoptive father.   We had a very respectful conversation for over an hour, I requested that they please discuss it with the adoptive couple and call me back in a week.  When we spoke the second time they had been instructed by their attorney, Larry Jenkins, to only go through their counsel and the courts when dealing with Jake.   I left all of our contact information and we hung up on very cordial terms.  

In fact my father, Jake’s grandfather, is still very good friends with adoptive grandparents and they see each other often.

In November 2011, I again was the one who wrote letters to the adoptive couple, grandparents, adoption agencies and attorneys.   This was not because Jake was not will or was not wanting to reach out.  I did it because I felt that as a mother, grandmother and concerned citizen it was my duty to do so.  Each of these letters are posted on the blog, in December 2011.  When we posted these letters Jake made sure that the names were redacted of all the adoptive family. 

This blog is set up for Jackson to be used as a journal and space to express emotions and spread Jack's story.  We hand out fliers everywhere we go, and have logos on our cars to get the word out about Jake and Jack’s story.  Again this is to help inform others of the abuse that is and has been happening in Utah adoptions as well as to help us deal with missing Jackson.

To imply that Jake has acted inappropriate towards the birth mother or the adoptive couple is just simply not true.  Jake has continued to fight in court for his right to parent his only child, he will continue to do so through the Utah Supreme Court.   We will also continue to work to change the laws in Utah to protect all parties in adoption, not just birth fathers.

Jake was with Whitney throughout her pregnancy, he did more than just financially support her.  They were together at family gatherings, Jack’s baby shower, Christmas events, and even at the lights the night before Jack was born.  Relationships are to be built on trust. Jake believed Whitney and even asked her around the middle of December if she was thinking of adoption – to which she responded “of course not, I can’t believe you would even ask me”.  Whitney’s only threat that Jake saw that was real at this time was that she would hold true to her word that if he did file on the paternity registry, if he did Whitney would receive notice, he would never see his son.  That is what Jake was told over and over by Whitney. That threat of not seeing his son was real if he filed. Jake watched how Whitney acted with Emery and her ex- husband.  Jake did not find out she was still married until the end of January 2011. Several others that know Whitney also believed that she was divorced.   Call it what you would like, fraud, deceit, manipulation but to ensure that Whitney was able to get what she wanted that is what she did. 

For a child who is in need of a loving home because their birth parent(s) cannot provide one for them for different reasons,then adoption is a blessing.  Most adoptive couples are trying to adopt because they cannot have their own biological children.  One way or another there has to be some type of loss for an adoptive child, sometimes it is for the adoptive parents as well.  Adoption has a lot of pain behind the veil of bliss that all would like to believe it is. 

To place a child into an adoptive situation when they have a loving father and family who has ALWAYS wanted, and can care for them is wrong.  Many adoptive children long for those who look like them, have their same genetic traits and talents.  It is not right to make the adoptive couple in fraudulent adoptions justify why they got to take the child home when their parents wanted them and did not place them for adoption.

Also, in fraudulent adoptions many things are left out such as medical information.  When both parents consent some agencies provide medical information, LDS family services is one agency that does.  But, because the social worker and Whitney did not want Jake involved, Jack has been denied his medical information.

Since we again know where Jack is, we have continued to reach out, we are willing to provide all information for Jack.  The adoptive couple’s attorney again has been the stumbling block.  But, all the adoptive couple has to do is to ask, even through their parents to Jake’s grandfather.  We have no other way to provide it.

Utah is a breeding ground for corruption because the laws have made fraudulent actions legal in adoption.  The truth is that these laws are only words on paper.  They will never change the fact that Jack is Jake’s son and part of our family.  Whether Jack comes home now, or is not able to connect with Jake until he is an adult we will be here for him.  Jack does not have to choose a family when he is an adult.  There is room for everyone, it is better to have more people in your life that love you.

We have NOT nor will we ever wish any ill will towards the adoptive couple.  We would never want Jack to be hurt or feel torn, but he has the right to the TRUTH and his FAMILY.

Dear adoptive parents of Jack, please love this little one with all of your heart.  Enjoy his every waking moment that he is in your care.  Take time to see the world through his baby blue eyes (I hope he got his daddy’s eyes).  Please don’t restrain his need for adventure, let him be curious and make mistakes to learn from.  If he takes after his daddy, you will love his outgoing funny personality, his true love for people, his wonderfully kind heart and trusting nature.   

Most of all treasure Jack as Jake does and love him enough to let him know his family. 

Sincerely, 

Jack's Grandma


Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Another Win For All Birth Fathers!

Jackson:

We still have hope that one day we will be able to be re-united with you and be able to be in your life and get to know you. We pray everyday for your safety and well being. We hope that you are being loved as much as we would love you. The holidays come with family, love, and laughter, and we always struggle celebrating these without you. This past holiday, Thanksgiving, we felt thankful to have you a part of our family, we felt grateful knowing where you are at, and that you are in good hands. We felt thankful that one day we will get to be a part of your life and get to be a part of your family. Jackson, we love you so much! We will never stop fighting for you. With each of these Utah Supreme Court decisions ruling in the favor of father's who's rights were wrongfully terminated gives us hope that the justices will see the truth in your case as well. We are waiting for some things to settle with the lower district court before we can move forward to the Utah Supreme Court. Jack, we love you with all our hearts.

Love,

YOUR FIRST FAMILY



The Salt Lake Tribune


Florida man gets a shot at being a dad

Adoption • Utah’s high court says father needs to have a chance to build a relationship with his child.


image
Leah Hogsten | Tribune file photo Florida resident Ramsey Shaud, left, appeared in Utah's Supreme Court, with his attorney Daniel Drage, in 2011 in his parental rights case.

In a 3-2 decision, the Utah Supreme Court has found that Utah’s adoption law was “constitutionally defective” in depriving a Florida father a “meaningful chance” to develop a relationship with his child after a notice of paternity he filed was not recorded in a timely manner because of the state’s then four-day workweek and a federal holiday.

The high court reversed a decision by a trial judge who found that Ramsey Shaud had acted too late to stop the adoption of his daughter, born in January 2010. The justices sent the case back to the lower court to reconsider whether the Utah Office Vital Records and Statistics received Shaud’s paternity notice before the child’s mother placed her for adoption.

Shaud alleges, the court noted, that he attempted to protect his parental rights in a timely fashion but that the office “negligently delayed” entry of his notice in the state’s paternity registry, which the trial judge used as a basis of finding he had moved too late to have any say in his daughter’s adoption.

“We conclude that the district court’s interpretation of the [adoption act’s] strict compliance standard poses an unacceptable risk of erroneous deprivation of unwed fathers’ rights,” the court said. It also said that protecting the state’s compelling interest in timely adoption decisions did not require that a paternity petition be considered filed only at the time it was entered into the registry.

“Rather, we hold that Mr. Shaud’s notice must be considered filed when Vital Records received it, because, at that point, Mr. Shaud had done all that he could to strictly comply with the act,” the court said.

The opinion was written by Justice Christine Durham, who was joined by Justices Ronald Nehring and Jill Parrish. Chief Justice Matthew Durrant and Justice Thomas Lee dissented.

The court heard oral arguments in the case in September 2011. It issued the decision Friday, but it was not posted on the court’s website until Tuesday after The Salt Lake Tribune inquired about the ruling.

“I honestly never thought this day would come!” Shaud said Tuesday. “All I can do is smile. ... [It has] restored my faith in the judicial system out there, and I look forward to getting our case going in the lower court.”

Daniel Drage, his attorney, praised the justices for thoroughly considering the constitutional implications and due-process pitfalls of Utah’s current adoption law. Drage said he and his client were looking forward to getting back in court for a hearing to “establish that he has perfected his rights as a father, that notice was timely received by the Bureau of Vital Records and that he will have an opportunity to be a father to his daughter.”

While the decision assures Shaud, 26, a shot at making the argument that he acted in time to protect his parental rights, it does not guarantee he’ll get to parent his child — a matter that will likely involve numerous additional court hearings in which his fitness as a parent will be weighed against those of the child’s adoptive parents and what is in the child’s best interests.

How it began • Shaud learned in 2009 that 19-year-old Shasta Tew, with whom he had a casual relationship, was pregnant. When Tew said she didn’t want to raise the baby, Shaud, who was then 22, said he would take responsibility and care for the child. After Tew began pursuing an adoption, Shaud refused to sign off and moved quickly to protect his parental rights for the coming baby, due in February 2010.

He signed with the Putative Father Registry in Florida, where both live, so he would be notified of any adoption proceedings. Five months later, Tew sent Shaud a note saying she planned to visit Arizona and Utah for the holidays. He feared her real intent was to go to one of those states to place her baby for adoption.

Shaud easily filed with Arizona’s registry but had trouble finding information about what he needed to do in Utah to protect his rights. At the time, Utah’s Department of Health did not provide a link to putative-father forms online; it added a link in January 2012.

Shaud hired Drage, who filed the required paternity petition in court Jan. 12, 2010, and the same day faxed a copy to the Office of Vital Records and Statistics. At the time, the state followed a four-day work schedule so it was closed that Friday, as well as the following Monday, which was a federal holiday. The office did not file Shaud’s paternity notice until Jan. 20, 2010.

By then, Tew had already given birth — Shaud’s daughter was born prematurely Jan. 15, 2010. On the same day Shaud’s paternity paperwork was officially filed, Tew relinquished her parental rights and the infant was placed with adoptive parents through A Act of Love Adoptions in Orem.

Shaud tried to fight the placement in a lower court, but a trial judge said he had acted too late to protect his parental rights under Utah’s adoption law. Shaud appealed.

The high court’s ruling is the second decision in a father’s favor this year. In January, it ruled a Colorado father was improperly denied a say in his daughter’s adoption and also sent the case back to a lower court for a rehearing.

In that decision, the court said Robert Manzanares did not know and reasonably could not have known that a birth and adoption would take place in Utah and that he needed to protect his rights here. Manzanares had filed a paternity petition in Colorado and had been assured by his daughter’s mother that she had no intention of placing the child for adoption, something the woman also told a Colorado judge. Manzanares learned about a week after his daughter’s birth Feb. 17, 2008, that she had been born in Utah and placed for adoption.

After the Utah Supreme Court ruling, a Utah judge dismissed Manzanares’ case so that it could proceed in Colorado. His parental rights were affirmed and, under the guidance of a child psychologist, he has slowly been introduced to and allowed to build a relationship with his daughter. She was told in October that Manzanares is her daddy.

A matter of timing • In Shaud’s case, the Vital Records office told A Act of Love that no paternity filing had been made; 45 minutes later, it officially logged Shaud’s paperwork.

But a notice “cannot be considered filed only upon its entry into Vital Records’ registry,” the high court said. “This definition of ‘filed’ creates unfair uncertainty as to the proper filing date and infringes upon Mr. Shaud’s opportunity interest in protecting his relationship with his daughter.”

The majority referred several times to the court’s decision in the 2007 case, in which it held that the state’s adoption law had to “avoid due process implications that arise when a father’s compliance is not within his power.”

It also said that Shaud’s attorney did not need to specifically use the “magic words” of “due process” in the lower court to raise that constitutional argument. The court pointed out the attorney had made numerous other references about the rights at stake. The fact that a copy of his court filing was not included with the notice did not matter because Vital Records accepted his filing and it was not the basis of the lower court’s ruling, the majority also said.

Those two points were the basis of the dissent. Justice Lee said the majority was “jumping the gun” and reading “far too much into the arguments Shaud presented in the district court.” He found that Shaud had not preserved a constitutional challenge but merely “questioned the fairness of the statutory scheme on policy grounds.”

“When Shaud complained that he had done everything within his control, he was not asserting the due process point that the court today embraces in his opinion,” Lee wrote in the dissent. “He was merely seeking, in other words, to protect his rights under the statute in light of his vague concerns about fairness and broad epithets about the state’s carelessness.”

brooke@sltrib.com

Twitter: @Brooke4Trib



Sunday, November 4, 2012

Little Cowboy.

Jack:

Every holiday our hearts break a little more and more. We yurn to know what you are doing, how you are developing and what you are embracing in your little heart and world. Halloween has come and gone and it's another holiday not spent with your real daddy and family. We feel so robbed not to get the opportunity to be with you. Your cousin Boston was a cowboy this Halloween and we know you would have loved to be his little sidekick. We know you are probably talking up a storm, and getting a sassy little attitude. We hope one day soon, we can reunite. As always praying for you and your safety.
 


Say Howdy to your cousin Boston!
 
 
We love you so much Jack!

Saturday, October 13, 2012

A letter to Jack

                                                                                                                                                  October 12, 2012
Dear Jack,
I was just thinking about you again today, and wanted to write down some of my thoughts so that one day when you come home you will know how much we have missed and loved you while you were away.
Today is Friday, one of my favorite days of the week because I get to tend your cousin Boston while his mommy and daddy are at work.  This morning Boston and I played cars and trucks in the toy room, we raced over the tracks, then the carpet and finally we went a little crazy and drove them over all the other toys, chairs and tables.  We crashed into each other and laughed more and more with each wreck, it was so much fun.  Then we went for a walk. We have two strollers still hanging in the garage one for you and one for Boston, as I reached for one my heart sank a little more because I wished once again you could be here with us. 
When we came home after enjoying seeing a fire engine, garbage truck and talking to the workers who are building a house down the road,  we walked past the wall of family pictures where the one and only picture of you is hanging.  Boston stopped and pointed to your picture and said Jack.   I love to see this photo every day; it reminds me what a blessing you are to have in our family. 
After lunch and more silly games Boston and I laid down to watch Monsters Inc, and it wasn’t long before he fell asleep which is where he is right now.  We will try to go outside to swing and jump on the tramp if it isn’t raining after he wakes up, if it is raining maybe we will just stay inside and make some cookies. 
Jack, I pray every day for you and your adoptive parents, and hope you are making wonderful memories together.  I hope that you are playing cars and trucks, going on long walks to enjoy the fresh air, and taking in all the beautiful flowers and trees.  I pray that you are seeing the world as it should be seen through a child’s eyes.    You deserve to feel loved, warm, cherished and protected.   I know your adoptive family through your adoptive dad’s side they are very kind and loving people, which does help us to know that you are in a good home.
Jack, we think of you daily. Whenever I see a blonde mommy with a toddler about your age I do a double take, and my heart skips a beat.   There are times I am in the same neighborhood where your grandparents live because your Great Aunt and Great Grandpa live just down the street.  I want to stop and just ask how you are doing, maybe to see a recent picture, to plead to let your daddy see you just once.  It breaks my heart how close you are, but we can’t reach out to you because of the lawyers. I am certain that your daddy’s side has not been shared with 100% honesty with your adoptive parents.  
Boston has now gone home with his mommy, after he woke up from his nap. It turned out to be a cookie making day because of the weather.   Your daddy stopped by for a few minutes to say hi to Boston on his lunch break from work. They played cars, tickled and chased each other for a while until they both were on the floor laughing.  Boston loves his Uncle Jake, and Jake loves his little buddy Boston, but he has a missing part of his heart where you will always fit.  He loves you so much.
Aunt Hailey came home just before Boston left and they were able to sit and read together while his mommy and I listened.  Jack, I am writing to you because this is the only way I have to reach out to you so far.  I know one day you will come home and know the truth why you weren’t with us for a while.  But, until then I don’t want you to miss out on the simple days that you should have had with us. 
I pray that you had a wonderful day today that you played and giggled, watched the rain on the windows, ate warm chocolate chip cookies and felt loved.
I love and miss you little Jack

Love Grandma Jenny

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Thinking about you

Jackson:

Our family can not stop thinking about you. We wonder about you every day and hope and pray you are being well taken care of. Every where we go there is something that reminds us of you. There are street signs with Jackson, trucks with the name Jackson on it, new little babies named Jack, little boys that are within 4 months like you and Boston everywhere. Everywhere we turn we think of you.

Jackson, you will know one day how much we love you and think about you. Jack, we wonder every day what you look like. Do you have baby blues like your daddy,? Are you a little Blondie or do you have dark brown hair? Are you a shy little boy or outgoing like your cousin? Do you like to play cars and trucks, and play outside? Hopefully, one day soon we will get answers to our questions.

August 1st is right around the corner and we can not be happier to finally be back in front of a judge to share with him OUR side of the story, and not be voiceless.

Jackson, there is so much positive change that has been happening with birth father rights everywhere. We can only hope this can help with bringing you home.

We love you Jack! See you soon.

XoXo,

Your family

Monday, June 4, 2012

Upcoming Fundraisers

We will be having another fundraiser yard sale on June 16th at 8:30 AM. The yard sale will held at 10397 South Whispering Sands Drive, South Jordan, Utah. If anyone is interested in donating bigger items, it would be greatly appreciated. Please send us an email through getbabyjackback@gmail.com and we can coordinate to pick it up. We appreciate all of the support we have had.

We will also be hosting a 5k in the next few months as well as a Harley Motorcylce Ride. The Harley ride most likely will take place on September 8th, beginning at the Lindon Harley Davidson and ending up in Ogden, at The Rainbow Saloon. More information to come on these.

Please come out and help support us with raising legal fees to get our baby back!!!! Thank you in advance for your help!

*****Update: We are currently in the process of waiting for a court date to intervene in the adoption in 2nd District Court. We are hoping that we can report on that in the next week or so. We are excited with some of the motions filed in this case that will give us some strong ammo.

We love you Jackson and we never stop thinking about you!

Monday, January 2, 2012

A glimmer of hope

We have a small glimmer of hope... We have an upcoming court date. January 17th at 1:30 PM in front of Judge Christiansen. We finally will be heard, and we hope that he feels as disgusted with opposing counsel on part of LDS Family Services, David Hardy, and the adoptive couple, Larry Jenkins, as we do. We have faith that he will do what is right, and intervene in the adoption, and call for an evidentiary hearing again. We really have been beat down these past few weeks, and really need a ray of sunshine.

If anyone would like to attend, please contact us and we can provide the details.

Thanks again for all for your continued support through these trying times.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Happy Birthday Jackson

Jackson,

Happy Birthday! It has been one long year. We have missed so many milestones with you such as your birth, your first bath, your first cry, your first word, you starting to crawl, and maybe even walk. Our hearts are heavy that we have not been able to see you, know if you are ok, are happy or even healthy. More than anything we hope that you are safe, and ok. We miss you and think about you every single day. We hope to meet you soon, but in the meantime we will keep fighting for you and for all the other voiceless children out there.

We have created a video for you from your family, and that includes a balloon release we did in honor of your first birthday. We wish more than anything that we would be able to celebrate it with you, but it doesn't look like that is going to happen. We will continue to do a balloon release every year you are not with us.



Happy Birthday Jackson!
May all your dreams come true.

Love,

Your Family




Sunday, December 25, 2011

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas Jackson. Our hearts are empty, because you are not here. This time of year is about family, and all we can think about is you. We miss you so much and can't wait for the day we can finally meet you. Jackson, we will never stop fighting for you. We hope you enjoy your first Christmas.

WE LOVE YOU!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Letter Five: To the maternal grandparents

November 15, 2011
Dear J and S;
I would like to start by saying that a copy of this letter and the certified mailing receipt has been retained in the binders that we have to share with Jackson when he is older.  Next I would like to state that Jake nor his attorney have any knowledge that I am writing to you, I am only doing so to share my feelings and comments as a mother, grandmother and woman.  What you decide to do with this letter and information is completely up to you, I am not making any threats or demands, though I am requesting that you contact us, to see and talk to Jake for yourself to understand the truth surrounding Jackson’s birth and family.   You can contact us through the blog at getbabyjackback.com, the Facebook page under the same name, (contact information removed) That said I would like to share my thoughts with you regarding, Jake, Jackson (aka Benjamin) and our family.  Yes, this is my side but you have the right to know all sides of this story since it directly impacts your lives and family now and in the future.
I have included some photos of our time with Whitney during her pregnancy with Jackson which show that she and Jake were together up through the night before Jackson was born.  There was no indication that Jackson was to be given up for adoption, in fact Whitney had requested that I take time off work to care for her and Jackson after she gave birth on January 12, 2011 via C-section.    I planned to take 3 weeks off work and had received approval to do so.  These are only some of the supporting documents which we have and are willing and wanting to share with you. 
J and S , I want to tell you first that Jake would have never intentionally caused the heartache and pain which your family has to go through these last 10 ½ months.     We would never wish this upon anyone and only hope and pray that all is resolved quickly so that we can all begin to heal. 
I am pretty sure that you are aware of who I am, and the situation which involves J, J, Jake, and Jackson (aka Benjamin).  I would assume that you also know that Jake is rightfully contesting Jackson’s adoption, and wants his son home with him.  Jake did not ever want to place Jackson for adoption, instead he was excited and preparing for the birth of his son with Whitney.  Jake supported Whitney throughout the pregnancy, financially, emotionally and physically.  There is supporting evidence of this which we want to share with J and J, and that someday Jackson will be able to see and read it as well. 
Whitney was with our family as well as Jake during the pregnancy, she attended Jackson’s cousins’ baby shower and the baby shower for Jackson.  Whitney and Jake had planned to raise Jackson through joint custody, Whitney had told Jake she was not ready to remarry, the truth was she was and is still currently married, though Jake did not know this until January 2011. 
Therefore Jake prepared a nursery at our home so that he could care for Jackson. Jake purchased the crib, bedding and supplies necessary for Jackson.  I painted the nursery to match the bedding Jake had chosen.  Whitney also helped with suggestions for the room.  She commented on how excited Jackson would be to have so many colorful animals to look at, and she stated her favorite was the pink flamingos.   There was no indication that Whitney was planning to give Jackson away.
I am writing to you only to share my feelings as a mother and grandparent, feelings that I am sure you can relate too.  As a parent some of the hardest and most rewarding times are when we watch as our children pay the consequences for their actions, good and bad.  But, the most devastating is when the actions of others intentionally cause such unbelievable heartache and pain for our children.  Because Whitney lied to Jake, his son was taken from him.  Jake lost his son, Whitney and Whitney’s daughter Emery on January 5th when Whitney finally told him that she had given Jackson away.   In that moment Jake lost his son, what he had with Whitney as a couple, and what he had thought was their potential family.

As a grandparent, I know you feel the same strong unconditional love for your sweet grandchildren as I do.  You know the feelings of excitement and the thrill that your child will be able to have by being a parent.  We both have had the joy of holding these sweet blessings from our Heavenly Father in our arms.  We know that there is no greater love that that of a parent/child and grandparent/grandchild.  Therefore, you know why we cannot and will not give up on our sweet Jackson.
Growing up I lived in the same ward as B and C, J’s parents.  At 16 years old I babysat J and his brothers, and they still see and know my siblings and father.  B and C are wonderful, kind people as I believe you are.  I am sure that you raised J with the same high morals and strong values which J was raised with.  It was a comfort when we found out where and who had our sweet Jackson, we knew that he would be cared for and safe.  I also believe that J and J did not request LDS Family Services to give them a child at any cost, and that if they had known the lies, deception and fraud surrounding Jackson’s birth that they would not have taken him. 
Heavenly Father does not work through lies, deception or fraud, nor does he bless the outcome resulting from those actions.  It is not right or fair to ask J and J to build their family foundation on fraud.  It would not and will not stand the test of time and eternity.  A family foundation needs and must be one of love, honestly and support.  Jackson will be told the truth one day of his birth whether it is when he is old enough and with his father, or when he is 18 and with J and J.
I was able to find you and your address through Google.  Jackson will not have any problem finding Jake, or our family with the advancements in technology as it is today and will be in the future.  He will most likely find Jake before 18.   Jackson has a sister, Emery and a so far one other cousin but there will be more, and all will be told about Jackson when they are older.  We will want to make sure they know how much we love him, and if he is not returned home to be raised with them that we will find and tell him the truth when he is 18.   This is not a threat this is reality, Jackson has the right to know the truth, his father and loving family.
 This letter is only to share with you my feelings, and concerns for Jackson first, then for J, J and Jake.  To make J and J build a family upon lies is wrong, and to deny a father his only child is wrong.  Though we are still in the middle of the court battle, Utah adoption laws support fraud committed by the birth mothers.  Therefore, Whitney, LDS Family Services, and the attorneys all can feel good about upholding the laws.  But, they will not be the ones who have to face Jackson (Ben) and tell him that because of dishonesty, fraudulent actions and misrepresentations by his birth mother and adoption agency he was taken from his loving father and family.
How, are J and J to raise Jackson with the same high morals, values and ethics which they were raised with?  When the only reason that Jackson is in their family is because of Whitney and LDS Family Service’s  lies, deception and fraudulent actions.
Please talk with J and J about Jake and this letter, please discuss the future when Jackson is told the truth if he is not returned home to Jake.   Then ask why you would want to put Jackson through that.  
There will be a child who has been placed by both parents waiting to come to J and J.  With that child they can build their family on honesty and truth which will stand the test of time for all eternity. 
J and J know that Jackson was not given up for adoption, that Jake has rightfully contested this action.  It is now up to them to stand for what is right, morally and ethically and return Jackson to Jake.  They need to let Jake see his only child, hold him, count his little fingers and toes.  Know that he is healthy, and happy.  No father should ever be denied these small yet so very important acts. 
Jake as missed Jackson’s birth, his first cry, and so many other milestones over the last 10 ½ months.  Jake has been denied information regarding Jackson’s health, no one would even share Jackson’s weight and height at birth with him.  Jake was able to get a picture from Kyle, Whitney’s husband who is working with us to bring Jackson home.  This is the only way Jake has to see his son, he has it as his screen saver, framed by his bed, and in his wallet.
 Understand, Jackson was and is loved and wanted by his father.   Know that Jake is a good, kind and hard working man who will be able to provide for himself and his son.  Jake was raised with high morals, and values, he also has supportive family and friends. 
Before any of us raise an eye to judge one another remember that will be taken care in the next life.  We in the meantime have our free agency and all must pay the price for our choices.   We must also stand for what is right and true and defend and protect those who are harmed through lies, deception and fraud.   Jackson is the innocent one in all of this and he does not and should not have to pay the ultimate price of losing his loving father and family do to lies, deception and fraud.
Jackson has the right to be home with Jake.   J and J have the right to adopt a child who was placed for adoption by both parents.  They should be able to take that child to the temple to be sealed for time and all eternity, and know that their family is based on truth and honesty.

                                                                                                Respectively

                                                                                                Jennifer Graham
                                                                                              Jake Strickland’s Mother and
                                                                                                Jackson Michael Strickland’s
                                                                                                Grandma